There Is Hope

I recently watched a video on youtube called 'Lost Generation'. It was entered in a competition and came second...I think. The video is of a poem written by a 20 year old. I would give almost anything to think like she does. It is a kind of palindrome, but it reads the opposite when you read it backwards. The poem starts with 'lost generation, but ends with 'there is hope'.

It is incredible to listen to. When it started I was a little bit confused as to why everyone thought it was so amazing because it was so pessimistic. Then she started reading the poem backwards...I could not believe that it made so much sense.

It made me think about the way different people see the world and where we are going with it. I realised that your view of life is what determines how you act and respond to certain situations.

Optimism is the key to success. If we are negative, it starts a turn of events that become a downward spiral that is hard to overcome. So, negativity is a waste of time and energy. Positivity is the thing that opens our mind to the many open doors that a pessimistic outlook tends to close.

I ask you now, to close your eyes and open your minds. When you find yourself in a gloomy situation, remember, there are always two ways a situation can play out. You can have the most amazing day or you can have a day that goes from bad to worse. It all depends on the way you look at the challenges you're faced with.

I believe there is hope. There is always hope in everything that happens in our lives. Sometimes, it is just hidden behind a really big, dark cloud. All we need to do is look for the tiniest glimpse of a ray of sunshine behind that cloud. That tiny glimpse of sunshine in your gloomy situation, is hope.

Life may be overwhelming at times, but we need to look for sunshine not focus on big, dark and scary clouds.

Life challenges us every day but there is always hope. Sometimes we just have to look for it. We must strive for a positive attitude in all aspects of our lives, try to evaporate those clouds of doubt and never let go of our rays of sunshine.

Why Can't I?

Last year, my grade 9 year, was probably the longest year I have ever experienced. It was not fun to say the least. I'm told that grade nine is not fun for most people. Apparently, it's the year of puberty. It's a year I would like to forget.

It started with a survey...
a survey aimed at finding out what the people in my class felt and thought. I needed help with getting up the stairs and getting books out of my bag. The questions were things like do you want to help Chaeli? Yes or no. If yes, what are you willing to help with? Then, there was space for comment.

The majority of my class said no. I didn't want to go to school the next Monday because I knew that people didn't want to help me, but I didn't know who said yes. So, I had a little mini-breakdown on the Monday and went to school on the Tuesday. It was the most awkward I have ever felt at school. I had to ask people to help me and I had no idea if they were doing it because they had to or because they genuinely wanted to.

There were some valid points made that you can't ignore - I don't want to hurt her, and I don't want to hurt myself. Two very understandable complaints. Then there were others - It's not my responsibility, she's not my friend so why should I help her. Those comments you can't ignore either. There were comments that were verging on the ridiculous. One was "Chaeli having a facilitator provides job opportunities for someone who would be otherwise unemployed". I'll let you draw your own conclusion on that one.

For almost the whole year, I was listening to my classmates say "If Chaeli can, why can't I?".

For example, I got typed notes and they had to write them, I was 'allowed' to be late for class and they weren't. All of these so-called problems could have been solved with a little common sense, but when puberty is involved all common sense seems to go out the window.

Grade 9 is the year when people are very self-centred and selfish. I am not denying that I was too in that mindset but I had to live with their selfishness as well.

I believe that people thought that I was just going to be grateful for whatever they were willing to give me. That I wasn't going to say when they were being insensitive or even just joking around about pushing me down the stairs. I told them what I thought of their remarks and they were shocked that I complained. They were helping me and now I was moaning.

General things that every 'normal' person does were inconceivable to them that I did the same things. Watching the Rugby World Cup Final, going to movies, knowing who's dating who. What, do they think I live in a hole somewhere?

People are amazed when they hear that I want to go to university. They're even more amazed when they find out that I do pure maths and not maths literacy. The assumption is that if your legs don't work, your brain doesn't work either. I plan to have a successful career, get married, have babies - you should hear the responses, how would you do that? is the most common response - just like any other 'normal' person.

This year is totally different. I am doing subjects that I enjoy with teachers who actually believe that I can deliver excellence and expect it from me. Having teachers who want you to be in their class because you can add value to lessons is a nice relief from feeling like I was just there to fill a space.

I am more optimistic now because people around me are more optimistic about my abilities and potential.

I was giving too much of my time, effort, and place in my thoughts to people who had no belief in me. I still find it hard to believe that they stole my mojo the way they did for the amount of time that they did. I spent a long time worrying about what they were thinking. I've stopped now.

I hope that you will try to see the ability, and potential in people instead of breaking down their self-belief and self-confidence, however unknowingly.

I'm in a better, more positive mindset because others are as well. Please remember that the way you think about people can be felt in the way you interact with them. Your views and thoughts affect people even if they are not voiced.

Here comes a comeback

I have been at a mainstream school since my grade 3 year in 2003. Primary school is the polar opposite to high school in every way.

Primary school was amazing! You have more friends than you do people you avoid. In high school, people judge you before they've even said a word to you.

Now, for me, that's something that I've learned to deal with. Not just at school but wherever I go. I try to change their minds but sometimes it takes a long time for them to come around. I focus my time on the people who see me before they see my wheelchair. Those are the people I want to spend time with, laugh with and have fun with.

I am a person who gets along better with guys than I do with girls. I think girls have too much drama often created by themselves. It seems too much effort to worry about. So, me having mainly guy friends brought about concerns about my social situation. Teachers had concerns, I was fine.

There are some people you can't change because their perspective comes from a place of ignorance.

I'll sketch the scene for you. It was break time at school, I was walking down the passage - well, not walking but you know what I mean - and a guy who was just standing with his friend, looked up, and said "Watch out, here comes the cripple". I can imagine what you are thinking right now. My friend who was walking with me was ready to smack him silly but I told him not to. I turned around and said "Watch out, here comes the idiot". I just sat there, looked at him and waited for a response. He was offended by me calling him an idiot. I thought, he had no understanding of how offensive his comment was to more people than just me. In the end, all I told him was that I can't help being a cripple, but he can help being an idiot.

I have learned that the way to deal with ignorant people is to have better comebacks than them. It's funny, because people don't expect me to say anything at all never mind have something important to say.

Hopefully, by speaking up like that will open their eyes and minds to not see a 'cripple' but see the possibility in the person.