Saturday, September 4, 2010

Tattoo time




It was my sixteenth birthday last Monday (30th August). My birthday present from my parents was a tattoo.

I have been thinking about what tattoo I would get - if I ever got one - and I decided that I would get the chinese symbol for resilience. I thought it would be a good one considering the things I have had to overcome in my life.

On Monday morning, I was woken by the singing of 'happy birthday to you'. Now, you must know that for two weeks before my birthday, people were being very sneaky and told me my birthday present was awesome. When I was given a box filled with underwear...I was a little disappointed. Then, they gave me a card that said I had a voucher for one tattoo at MOB Inc. I didn't believe them at first.

I had an appointment for today at 2. Being true to family tradition, we were late. I was stressing.

I was a little nervous but more excited about getting my tattoo. Daniel, the tattoo artist, was still busy working on his previous client. I was fine, nerve wise, until I heard the noise of the needles.

My sister had to hold me in my wheelchair. To stop spasms from changing the wanted outcome.

Daniel was amazing. I was stressed - I think you can understand why. He was so chilled and made the whole experience a lot more enjoyable than I was expecting.

Sunday, June 27, 2010

How can someone pinch the marmalade?

We are all now safely back home. It was a very interesting four days at the festival.

As always, there was drama. There is always going to be drama when you go away with more than one person. We were a group of thirty eight. So, you can imagine the drama.

We performed for two days with two shows per day. Our first show was not so good. We had a little bit of backstage tension. But every production has one bad show. That was our's. The rest were awesome.

Our last performance was a charity show at the correctional services. We were a bit tense about it. We were nervous because we had never been in an environment like that. We did our show outside in the exercise quad. It was our best performance.

We went to Sundowners. This is where shows have the opportunity to give the people a preview. Each show has six minutes to persuade the crowd. We had a good six minutes. We stayed to watch a few other previews - some were quite strange.

Everyone stayed in the university residences that were turned into hotels. Each res/hotel has a few wardens who are there to help the guests. We were friends with all of them.

Some funny things happened in those four days. At breakfast on the first day there was no marmalade. The people swore that they had put it out before the guests arrived. hmmm...

We had to rearrange our room a little bit so I could get in easier. The first time, though, we had to take my footrests off my wheelchair to get around the door and the bed. We then had a rehearsal, so off we went. without the footrests. Now, Jesse usually uses it as well. That day was no different. He quickly realised the error of his ways when he nearly landed on his face.

Jed, a cast member, slipped in the bathroom and dislocated his shoulder. He was rushed to hospital so they could relocate it.

I have decided to become a Grahamstown Festival regular. You will see me there until it is no more.

Sunday, June 20, 2010

On the road again.

For the last six months, our dance school has been rehearsing for a play called 'Soar Like An Eagle'. The play is about how dancing can change a person's life and the journey towards that point of change.

We've performed at various venues, namely Rocklands Civic Centre in Mitchell's Plain and Milnerton Playhouse.

Our next stop. Grahamstown Festival. We're all very excited because we have never performed at a festival before. Our group is leaving at different times to make it easier and cheaper. We have to drive there because it's a mission to fly to Port Elizabeth and then drive to Grahamstown anyway. Ten hours of car here we come.

I think everybody can understand that there is only so much a person can do for ten hours in a car. Eat, sleep, read for a little bit, listen to music, and eat again. For us, that would cover about two hours. What about the other eight?

Things I have learned from previous trips:
1. Always have a good amount of food - mostly sweet stuff. For empty moments when you have nothing else to do.
2. It's all about layering. Wear multiple layers of clothing with varying degrees of warmth. This is to avoid being caught unawares at a robot next to a group of bikers. True story.
3. Most importantly, MOVE AROUND. You don't want to get out of the car, not be able to use your limbs, fall on your face, and die of embarrassment. In spite of your humiliation, this is very funny for others around you.

I hope these are helpful for your trips to come. I hope they come in handy to avoid future catastrophes.

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Freedom from the tarmac

I've been doing wheelchair dancing for almost four years now. It's really rad to be able to do things that people don't expect me to be capable of.

Every year, on Freedom Day, we do a demonstration at a disability awareness walk. It is always really early in the morning because we have to dance before the people start their walk for awareness. My partner, Jesse, and I are not what you would call 'a morning person'. We have perfected the art of faking being awake.

You must know, when we are dancing, there is bound to be some sort of catastrophe.

Just so you understand the circumstances that we were dancing under, the walk starts outside Vangate Mall. That means that we had to dance outside on the tarmac. Don't worry, that's certainly not the worst thing we've been required to dance on. The worst by far, was dancing outside the parliament buildings on, wait for it, cobblestones. I promise you, that was a unique experience if I ever had one.

But to get back to the story, last year, at the walk, Jesse forgot to check the back wheel (that's the one that keeps the chair stable) and well, I went over backwards. very close to hitting the floor. Luckily, Jesse had fast reflexes that day.

So, this year, to keep up the tradition, we had yet another extravagant failure that nobody noticed because they thought it was all part of the show.

It started off with a power failure. Lucky for us, the police band was there and we made a plan. I have to say, I've never done that before. Then, half-way through the demonstration, power was restored. The first song that actually played was an awesome tango. Then....Quickstep.

Now, quickstep in general is a pretty fast dance to begin with. But now, Jesse is a bit of a showoff. I knew when he looked at Danielle (she's another dancer who dances with Mukkie, he's in a wheelchair as well) that it was not going to end well.

Off we went. When we had gone around the floor once, Jesse tripped. Hold the gasp. He tripped over a rock, smaller than a pea. When going at speed, the smallest thing can create the most disastrous situation.

Jesse fell to his knees, with very little grace, I have to say. What made things worse was that he was holding my arms, which meant that I was on two wheels once again. He realised that he would be in big trouble if I had landed on my head.

He kind of did a sort of mooncrawl, stumbled a little, stood up and pretended that nothing had happened. Amidst all of this hysteria, there were a couple of choice words in there. I'm forever hopeful that people didn't hear us. When we walked off the floor, we saw the damage. Jesse's pants are now holy....so is his knee.

I don't think Jesse understands how much I trust him. He thinks I don't trust him because I won't let him kick over my head. I trust him completely, his hamstrings not so much.

It's nice to have someone who you know will destroy himself in order to save you. I hope everyone has a person like that in their lives who they trust entirely.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

There Is Hope

I recently watched a video on youtube called 'Lost Generation'. It was entered in a competition and came second...I think. The video is of a poem written by a 20 year old. I would give almost anything to think like she does. It is a kind of palindrome, but it reads the opposite when you read it backwards. The poem starts with 'lost generation, but ends with 'there is hope'.

It is incredible to listen to. When it started I was a little bit confused as to why everyone thought it was so amazing because it was so pessimistic. Then she started reading the poem backwards...I could not believe that it made so much sense.

It made me think about the way different people see the world and where we are going with it. I realised that your view of life is what determines how you act and respond to certain situations.

Optimism is the key to success. If we are negative, it starts a turn of events that become a downward spiral that is hard to overcome. So, negativity is a waste of time and energy. Positivity is the thing that opens our mind to the many open doors that a pessimistic outlook tends to close.

I ask you now, to close your eyes and open your minds. When you find yourself in a gloomy situation, remember, there are always two ways a situation can play out. You can have the most amazing day or you can have a day that goes from bad to worse. It all depends on the way you look at the challenges you're faced with.

I believe there is hope. There is always hope in everything that happens in our lives. Sometimes, it is just hidden behind a really big, dark cloud. All we need to do is look for the tiniest glimpse of a ray of sunshine behind that cloud. That tiny glimpse of sunshine in your gloomy situation, is hope.

Life may be overwhelming at times, but we need to look for sunshine not focus on big, dark and scary clouds.

Life challenges us every day but there is always hope. Sometimes we just have to look for it. We must strive for a positive attitude in all aspects of our lives, try to evaporate those clouds of doubt and never let go of our rays of sunshine.

Monday, April 5, 2010

Why Can't I?

Last year, my grade 9 year, was probably the longest year I have ever experienced. It was not fun to say the least. I'm told that grade nine is not fun for most people. Apparently, it's the year of puberty. It's a year I would like to forget.

It started with a survey...
a survey aimed at finding out what the people in my class felt and thought. I needed help with getting up the stairs and getting books out of my bag. The questions were things like do you want to help Chaeli? Yes or no. If yes, what are you willing to help with? Then, there was space for comment.

The majority of my class said no. I didn't want to go to school the next Monday because I knew that people didn't want to help me, but I didn't know who said yes. So, I had a little mini-breakdown on the Monday and went to school on the Tuesday. It was the most awkward I have ever felt at school. I had to ask people to help me and I had no idea if they were doing it because they had to or because they genuinely wanted to.

There were some valid points made that you can't ignore - I don't want to hurt her, and I don't want to hurt myself. Two very understandable complaints. Then there were others - It's not my responsibility, she's not my friend so why should I help her. Those comments you can't ignore either. There were comments that were verging on the ridiculous. One was "Chaeli having a facilitator provides job opportunities for someone who would be otherwise unemployed". I'll let you draw your own conclusion on that one.

For almost the whole year, I was listening to my classmates say "If Chaeli can, why can't I?".

For example, I got typed notes and they had to write them, I was 'allowed' to be late for class and they weren't. All of these so-called problems could have been solved with a little common sense, but when puberty is involved all common sense seems to go out the window.

Grade 9 is the year when people are very self-centred and selfish. I am not denying that I was too in that mindset but I had to live with their selfishness as well.

I believe that people thought that I was just going to be grateful for whatever they were willing to give me. That I wasn't going to say when they were being insensitive or even just joking around about pushing me down the stairs. I told them what I thought of their remarks and they were shocked that I complained. They were helping me and now I was moaning.

General things that every 'normal' person does were inconceivable to them that I did the same things. Watching the Rugby World Cup Final, going to movies, knowing who's dating who. What, do they think I live in a hole somewhere?

People are amazed when they hear that I want to go to university. They're even more amazed when they find out that I do pure maths and not maths literacy. The assumption is that if your legs don't work, your brain doesn't work either. I plan to have a successful career, get married, have babies - you should hear the responses, how would you do that? is the most common response - just like any other 'normal' person.

This year is totally different. I am doing subjects that I enjoy with teachers who actually believe that I can deliver excellence and expect it from me. Having teachers who want you to be in their class because you can add value to lessons is a nice relief from feeling like I was just there to fill a space.

I am more optimistic now because people around me are more optimistic about my abilities and potential.

I was giving too much of my time, effort, and place in my thoughts to people who had no belief in me. I still find it hard to believe that they stole my mojo the way they did for the amount of time that they did. I spent a long time worrying about what they were thinking. I've stopped now.

I hope that you will try to see the ability, and potential in people instead of breaking down their self-belief and self-confidence, however unknowingly.

I'm in a better, more positive mindset because others are as well. Please remember that the way you think about people can be felt in the way you interact with them. Your views and thoughts affect people even if they are not voiced.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Here comes a comeback

I have been at a mainstream school since my grade 3 year in 2003. Primary school is the polar opposite to high school in every way.

Primary school was amazing! You have more friends than you do people you avoid. In high school, people judge you before they've even said a word to you.

Now, for me, that's something that I've learned to deal with. Not just at school but wherever I go. I try to change their minds but sometimes it takes a long time for them to come around. I focus my time on the people who see me before they see my wheelchair. Those are the people I want to spend time with, laugh with and have fun with.

I am a person who gets along better with guys than I do with girls. I think girls have too much drama often created by themselves. It seems too much effort to worry about. So, me having mainly guy friends brought about concerns about my social situation. Teachers had concerns, I was fine.

There are some people you can't change because their perspective comes from a place of ignorance.

I'll sketch the scene for you. It was break time at school, I was walking down the passage - well, not walking but you know what I mean - and a guy who was just standing with his friend, looked up, and said "Watch out, here comes the cripple". I can imagine what you are thinking right now. My friend who was walking with me was ready to smack him silly but I told him not to. I turned around and said "Watch out, here comes the idiot". I just sat there, looked at him and waited for a response. He was offended by me calling him an idiot. I thought, he had no understanding of how offensive his comment was to more people than just me. In the end, all I told him was that I can't help being a cripple, but he can help being an idiot.

I have learned that the way to deal with ignorant people is to have better comebacks than them. It's funny, because people don't expect me to say anything at all never mind have something important to say.

Hopefully, by speaking up like that will open their eyes and minds to not see a 'cripple' but see the possibility in the person.

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Take A Breath

I'm writing this blog because I want to tell my story to people. You may not know alot about disability and the ability within the people who live with them. I hope to change that.

My name is Chaeli Mycroft, I am fifteen and living with cerebral palsy. I was diagnosed with cerebral palsy when I was eleven months old. I also have a degenerative neuropathy that the doctors discovered when I was 6. This is my medical condition. I do not live my life according to this diagnosis.

I may be in a wheelchair, but I live a somewhat normal, pretty hectic, stressfull at times, amazing life!

With this blog I want to show you that disabled people live life and function just as 'normal' people do, argue with siblings just as 'normal' people do and have bad days just as 'normal people do.

I hope by reading this you will discover things in yourself that you never knew you were capable of. I hope you will learn to just take a breath...and listen to what people have in their hearts instead of seeing the things that they cannot change.